Your a falling star
Your the get away car
Your the line in the sand
When i go too far
Your the swimming pool
On my estate
Your the perfect thing to sing
And you play it coy
But its kinda cute
When you smile at me you know exactly what you do
Baby dont pretend,
That you dont know its true
That you can see it when i look at u
And in this crazy life, in this crazy times
Its you, its you, you make me sing,
Your every line, your every word
Your everything.
Im so tired nowadays. The fire inside doesnt seem to burn anymore cos everything seems murky. Expectations, objectives, plans. Everything seems to mean everything but mean nothing. How oxymoronic can u get?
I cant help but feel like im in a quaterlife crisis.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
The Ride of the Valkyrie
After watching this movie ive learnt a few things.
1)My Armour friend was telling me that if things start to falter in an operation, it always takes an Armour Officer to get things done.
2)Indecision kills. Literally.
3)A man is only a man when he makes a decision and sticks with it no matter what the consequence. That way, he's word is always true, and no one can take that away from him.
4)Hitler was either damn lucky or the rest were damn unlucky. Either way, we all knew how it was going to end.
5)Every operation has its cock ups. You can never run out of contingencies.
I liked Valkyrie. It reminded me of how the Romans used to try and oust the current government. It was always for the good of Rome, for the good of the people, for the good of the future. In fact, it normally meant for the good of the individual or a select few. In retrospect, we could say that the guys behind the plots to destroy Hitler were doing the right thing, but how could they have known that at that time? Everyone was still behind the regime. So how could this guys have the foresight to actually say " hey, i think this is wrong. I believe that i should not standby and let it happen." Without knowing what lay in the future, they put everything on the line to achieve the ideals and principles they stood for, believing what they were doing was right and just.
As Tommy puts it so eloquently in 'Snatch' as he points the gun to the head of the gangsta armed with a baseball bat, will i ever have the "minerals" to stick to my plan, no matter the cost?
Inshallah. God Willing.
Saturday, February 14, 2009
V-Day
A few things ive learnt today:-
1) v day isnt so bad when u spend it with friends. No matter how incredibly negative u feel.
2) i think ive dated too much cos one ex is attached to someone close to me while another is getting married to a cousin!
3) you can blog with the iphone!
4) no matter how bad things go, faith in your product is the most rewarding thing of all. Cos no matter what, theres always a chance of success. Apologies to all because i began to lose faith in everything. And everyone.
5) im not as funny as i thought.
6) im not as mature as i thought.
7) im wise enough to realise iM not very mature.
8) im taking the first steps in accomplishing the 3 tasks i set for myself!
Night all. Im all DONE for the day..
:D
1) v day isnt so bad when u spend it with friends. No matter how incredibly negative u feel.
2) i think ive dated too much cos one ex is attached to someone close to me while another is getting married to a cousin!
3) you can blog with the iphone!
4) no matter how bad things go, faith in your product is the most rewarding thing of all. Cos no matter what, theres always a chance of success. Apologies to all because i began to lose faith in everything. And everyone.
5) im not as funny as i thought.
6) im not as mature as i thought.
7) im wise enough to realise iM not very mature.
8) im taking the first steps in accomplishing the 3 tasks i set for myself!
Night all. Im all DONE for the day..
:D
Thursday, February 12, 2009
Musings
Ive been thinking.. Do things really change when u grow up? i mean, sure, when i was 10 i loved drinking kickapoo joy juice, you know that acidic yellow drink filled with nothing but sugar and caffeine? Now i dont really like it that much, perhaps a 4 out of ten?
A couple of years ago, i was presented with an opportunity that i knew i would miss if i blinked. So i didnt. Worked as best i can at it, only to find that in the end, i was just kidding myself that i would achieve that dream.
Some time ago, miracles of miracles, ANOTHER opportunity presented itself. Much of the same as the intitial one but with differing variables: i was older, wiser, had more experience in the field and I knew what it took to actually succeed in this endaevour. But no matter how hard i tried, twisting this way and that, patiently holding back the young enthusiastic buck who had all but died away, only to find the end result matching the earlier chance.
So, however much ive grown, have i really changed at all? I still look the same, albeit more leathery and haggard due to the exposure to the sun. Im still the same height, the same built, my hairs the same colour. But i know that ive changed. My eyes are different. My brain think in different patterns. My words are measured, still vulgar and abrasive at times, but gentle. I might not have become smarter but i definitely have become wiser. So why the same outcome?
I guess, in retrospect, my goals might have changed, but my reaction to certain subject matter,places and people are still the same. I might have dulled the foolish tongue, but even a blunt knife can kill. Im still the same person after all. Just slightly stronger, more patient, and more resilient.
I wont CMCF right now. Even though i want to. There is just no point. Its a waste of energy and will only lead to me being utterly shagged out. No. i will be patient, as is my wont. I will be disciplined, and i will not let this setback destroy the Zen that i have built over the past 2 years of my life.
hmmph. Sometimes im really Macam paham only.. haha..
A couple of years ago, i was presented with an opportunity that i knew i would miss if i blinked. So i didnt. Worked as best i can at it, only to find that in the end, i was just kidding myself that i would achieve that dream.
Some time ago, miracles of miracles, ANOTHER opportunity presented itself. Much of the same as the intitial one but with differing variables: i was older, wiser, had more experience in the field and I knew what it took to actually succeed in this endaevour. But no matter how hard i tried, twisting this way and that, patiently holding back the young enthusiastic buck who had all but died away, only to find the end result matching the earlier chance.
So, however much ive grown, have i really changed at all? I still look the same, albeit more leathery and haggard due to the exposure to the sun. Im still the same height, the same built, my hairs the same colour. But i know that ive changed. My eyes are different. My brain think in different patterns. My words are measured, still vulgar and abrasive at times, but gentle. I might not have become smarter but i definitely have become wiser. So why the same outcome?
I guess, in retrospect, my goals might have changed, but my reaction to certain subject matter,places and people are still the same. I might have dulled the foolish tongue, but even a blunt knife can kill. Im still the same person after all. Just slightly stronger, more patient, and more resilient.
I wont CMCF right now. Even though i want to. There is just no point. Its a waste of energy and will only lead to me being utterly shagged out. No. i will be patient, as is my wont. I will be disciplined, and i will not let this setback destroy the Zen that i have built over the past 2 years of my life.
hmmph. Sometimes im really Macam paham only.. haha..
Friday, January 23, 2009
Alright! Lets write!
"So, there i was just basically sitting there doing just nothing, and this guy comes up to me and says, you gotta be kidding me! and he jams this really ancient looking piece, and im talking ancient dinosauric with a capital D, right into my armpit and just laughs! Yeah, he just laughs! Its like he was a maniac or something!"
I wondered silently if it was a maniac with a capital M.
"So then i says to him.." Moe was determined to tell his story, but i could tell it was a believable as his rolex that had the numbers 3, 6, and 9 in roman numerals and totally poiting in the wrong directions.
"So you say to him."
"What?" Brows furrowed, brain trying to register this sentence but unfortunately, if his noggin was a register it was not a very big one. Or a very fast one. "That's what i said!"
"Nope, you said, 'So then, i says to him' dot dot dot," I said, underlining the dots with a dot on my notebook. "Its say. Present tense, singular."
Face getting redder now. Sweat bumps appearing among swarthy features and erupting down his grimy skin. Moe mouth opens and close for a few more times before he decided having it stay shut was the proper thing to do.
"Ok, Mr Turner. I just had a pretty long night. One of my clients just got threatened by her ex and I was up all night doing surveillance. I know your very enthusiastic, and this is the what.. 5th time your applying for this job?"
Moe looked affronted and held up seven fingers.
"Fine, 7th time. But i really need a proper assistant. someone who can work my file drawers, pull up leads from the streets while im up elsewhere, someone who can do surveillance while im trying to break in. I mean youve got nothing but your stories that you keep telling me are true!" Actually, i was pretty impressed with his record. Born in '98, he had served with the boys in flanders and was one of the few who came back with nary a gas mark. Recorded company marksman, fittest man in his platoon and seems to have been almost decorated with the congressional medal of honour, but he claimed it was someone else. The perfect guy for the team i was assembling.
But he just can't shut up!
"But they are true! The german put his piece in my armpit, started yelling crazy horse, so i smashed him in the face with a leftover under and he went willy-nilly over no mans land back to his mama's skirts! And i even got a little bit of him with me!" Moe took out an envelope from the inside of his jacket pocket and opened it. Inside was a small brownish lump that he shook onto his hand, before almost throwing it at me to let me see.
"See, thats his front teeth, the one I smashed in when he tried to bite me a little later!" His grin was crazy but winning, and when i say winning i mean like winning the bullet in Russian Roulette.
I waved my hand. "Ill think about it. Right now im really busy."
"Come one, boss!" He had whisked away the tooth and now had his hat in his hands. " ive got kids to feed, see? And the missus aint going to be too pleased if i dont get no job soon. She promised not to give me any whoopi if i dont get something together!"
i winced, got out of my chair and opened the door to my office with a bang. "Out! i dont want to hear about the ammoural adventures of the toad family! Ill think about it I said, and ill call on you if i need your services! Go!"
Moe put his hat on and morosely left, dragging his scuffed shoes over my persian carpet. He caught his hat in the chandlier that Monica bought me when we went to paris on our honeymoon, stumbled,tripped over Keejo, who was hidding under the divan the whole time and only choosing that perfect instant to dash out and have a sniff at Moe, who finally went head first through my window.
I put my head in my hands.
There was a sound of glass pieces being dropped on the floor as Moe extricated himself from the mess. " Im so.. so sorry, mister.."
"GET!"
I wondered silently if it was a maniac with a capital M.
"So then i says to him.." Moe was determined to tell his story, but i could tell it was a believable as his rolex that had the numbers 3, 6, and 9 in roman numerals and totally poiting in the wrong directions.
"So you say to him."
"What?" Brows furrowed, brain trying to register this sentence but unfortunately, if his noggin was a register it was not a very big one. Or a very fast one. "That's what i said!"
"Nope, you said, 'So then, i says to him' dot dot dot," I said, underlining the dots with a dot on my notebook. "Its say. Present tense, singular."
Face getting redder now. Sweat bumps appearing among swarthy features and erupting down his grimy skin. Moe mouth opens and close for a few more times before he decided having it stay shut was the proper thing to do.
"Ok, Mr Turner. I just had a pretty long night. One of my clients just got threatened by her ex and I was up all night doing surveillance. I know your very enthusiastic, and this is the what.. 5th time your applying for this job?"
Moe looked affronted and held up seven fingers.
"Fine, 7th time. But i really need a proper assistant. someone who can work my file drawers, pull up leads from the streets while im up elsewhere, someone who can do surveillance while im trying to break in. I mean youve got nothing but your stories that you keep telling me are true!" Actually, i was pretty impressed with his record. Born in '98, he had served with the boys in flanders and was one of the few who came back with nary a gas mark. Recorded company marksman, fittest man in his platoon and seems to have been almost decorated with the congressional medal of honour, but he claimed it was someone else. The perfect guy for the team i was assembling.
But he just can't shut up!
"But they are true! The german put his piece in my armpit, started yelling crazy horse, so i smashed him in the face with a leftover under and he went willy-nilly over no mans land back to his mama's skirts! And i even got a little bit of him with me!" Moe took out an envelope from the inside of his jacket pocket and opened it. Inside was a small brownish lump that he shook onto his hand, before almost throwing it at me to let me see.
"See, thats his front teeth, the one I smashed in when he tried to bite me a little later!" His grin was crazy but winning, and when i say winning i mean like winning the bullet in Russian Roulette.
I waved my hand. "Ill think about it. Right now im really busy."
"Come one, boss!" He had whisked away the tooth and now had his hat in his hands. " ive got kids to feed, see? And the missus aint going to be too pleased if i dont get no job soon. She promised not to give me any whoopi if i dont get something together!"
i winced, got out of my chair and opened the door to my office with a bang. "Out! i dont want to hear about the ammoural adventures of the toad family! Ill think about it I said, and ill call on you if i need your services! Go!"
Moe put his hat on and morosely left, dragging his scuffed shoes over my persian carpet. He caught his hat in the chandlier that Monica bought me when we went to paris on our honeymoon, stumbled,tripped over Keejo, who was hidding under the divan the whole time and only choosing that perfect instant to dash out and have a sniff at Moe, who finally went head first through my window.
I put my head in my hands.
There was a sound of glass pieces being dropped on the floor as Moe extricated himself from the mess. " Im so.. so sorry, mister.."
"GET!"
Monday, January 12, 2009
13
13 days after the new year, and things are kinda looking up.
Remember i said i might bollock up my new years eve? well i didnt, apparently, and it still turned out great. Completely missed the fireworks though, but it was kinda fun running into dome to surprise man(who wasnt really surprised, by the way) and playing a few hands of "Family business". It was fun, cos we all came up with nick names and mine was the Green Coat(no surprise there), Dhaniah was "Blind" Kelly, Aishah was Black widow, Yi Han was Doc Cheong, Yazid was RugRats(don't ask), Shai was the Godfather(even less of a surprise) shahdon was Don IvannaHumpalot(which was surprisingly funny!) and Man i christened as Don Mantero.. It was night full of laughs and i smile everytime i think about it.. It was friendship that had lasted for 4 years now, and still going strong.. :)
I rented a car for Shai's birthday bash and was well rewarded by getting saddled with the emcee job, which was kinda cool i suppose.. I did pretty well( at least that was what i was told lah) and i suppose i could take alot from that particular experience, seeing that i had absolutely no time to plan and just winged it all the goddamn way.. but it was fun and i kinda got the crowd joining in, so it was a success!
I had a few objectives to meet for the car, i mean I did pay 230 dollars for a beat up Swift, and if I didnt meet them i would have been pretty pissed off.
Haha. Good thing I accomplished every single one I set out to do. Even the hardest, most impossible one. 2009 is looking like a good year. :)
Remember i said i might bollock up my new years eve? well i didnt, apparently, and it still turned out great. Completely missed the fireworks though, but it was kinda fun running into dome to surprise man(who wasnt really surprised, by the way) and playing a few hands of "Family business". It was fun, cos we all came up with nick names and mine was the Green Coat(no surprise there), Dhaniah was "Blind" Kelly, Aishah was Black widow, Yi Han was Doc Cheong, Yazid was RugRats(don't ask), Shai was the Godfather(even less of a surprise) shahdon was Don IvannaHumpalot(which was surprisingly funny!) and Man i christened as Don Mantero.. It was night full of laughs and i smile everytime i think about it.. It was friendship that had lasted for 4 years now, and still going strong.. :)
I rented a car for Shai's birthday bash and was well rewarded by getting saddled with the emcee job, which was kinda cool i suppose.. I did pretty well( at least that was what i was told lah) and i suppose i could take alot from that particular experience, seeing that i had absolutely no time to plan and just winged it all the goddamn way.. but it was fun and i kinda got the crowd joining in, so it was a success!
I had a few objectives to meet for the car, i mean I did pay 230 dollars for a beat up Swift, and if I didnt meet them i would have been pretty pissed off.
Haha. Good thing I accomplished every single one I set out to do. Even the hardest, most impossible one. 2009 is looking like a good year. :)
Monday, December 29, 2008
New Year
Well. 2 more days to the new year. Woop di doo.
The way I see it, i have a choice: should i view this year in an optimistic way, or a crap negative way? Because in many cases, it fits both profiles very, very well.
I think back to the beginning of the year, and remembered how i started it. 2008 was a year of promise, career going well, had someone i was slowly falling for, and my family is as tightly knit as ever. Things seem pretty smooth sailing to me.
Someone told me that the way you spend New Years Eve is the way you were going to spend the new year. I think thats pretty bullshit lah. Here I am at the end of the year, and all i can think about are the negative thats happened.
But what if its the reverse? Say, if i had a totally bollocky new years eve, getting arrested by the cops for drink driving, find that my gf is making out with another guy, lose my commission, lose the ability to talk cock at a very fast pace, swallowing a piece of my shoe(wow. random.) even getting laughd at by my friends.. maybe its going to turn out better than expected! Maybe ill get rich or something, find nirvana, write a script that's worth millions, fall in love with the gal of my dreams, own a restaurant.. the positive things are endless! yes!
I shall do it! i Shall bollock up my new year!
Oh, who gives a fuck. I just wanna brood.
Happy New Year everyone. Ill be hiding in my bunk doing something really sad. Hah.
The way I see it, i have a choice: should i view this year in an optimistic way, or a crap negative way? Because in many cases, it fits both profiles very, very well.
I think back to the beginning of the year, and remembered how i started it. 2008 was a year of promise, career going well, had someone i was slowly falling for, and my family is as tightly knit as ever. Things seem pretty smooth sailing to me.
Someone told me that the way you spend New Years Eve is the way you were going to spend the new year. I think thats pretty bullshit lah. Here I am at the end of the year, and all i can think about are the negative thats happened.
But what if its the reverse? Say, if i had a totally bollocky new years eve, getting arrested by the cops for drink driving, find that my gf is making out with another guy, lose my commission, lose the ability to talk cock at a very fast pace, swallowing a piece of my shoe(wow. random.) even getting laughd at by my friends.. maybe its going to turn out better than expected! Maybe ill get rich or something, find nirvana, write a script that's worth millions, fall in love with the gal of my dreams, own a restaurant.. the positive things are endless! yes!
I shall do it! i Shall bollock up my new year!
Oh, who gives a fuck. I just wanna brood.
Happy New Year everyone. Ill be hiding in my bunk doing something really sad. Hah.
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Terence Lee- An old classmate
For five years I've known you, yet we've became as strangers, oblivious to each other's presence.
There were times you shared, your sorrows and pains, your struggles and your weaknesses, but what did it amount to?
With silence you killed me and this relationship, pretending I'm a stranger.
Silence is lethal, it means nothing, yet says so much.
It causes the mind to go crazy, to speculate, and obliterate.
It says, "leave me alone!" Yet causes the heart to grow ever fonder.
Silence is a knife, cutting without a sound, splitting without much fuss.
It is potent, effective, yet empty at the same time.
It whispers "go no farther" to a car speeding at a hundred miles an hour.
Perhaps it's not me, but yourself, or the institution, that's causing you to feel this way.
Maybe you feel guilty, embaressed, or non-chalant.
Maybe you feel angry, sad, and disappointed.
Maybe it's disillusionment, disgust, and utter shame.
A thousand maybes, all the fruit of your silence.
Why do this to me, and to many others?
What irony, in the age of social networking, that you are silent yet loud at the same time.
Your Facebook profile screams at me, inviting me to peek into your life.
From personal to impersonal, your smile fades, your joy reeks, it disgusts me.
What hides behind that smile? Is it unbridled joy, endless sorrow, or something in between?
Your presence is an insult, a constant shadow, chasing me into my dreams.
It's time to let you go, yet it's so hard.
Maybe we will meet someday again, and I wish you success.
May you find happiness in your pursuits, and will you please reach your dreams for me?
Should you leave these shores, may you not forget yourself.
Someday, maybe, we will meet.
May God be with you.
Courtesy of Senhor Terence Lee, an ex-classmate with flair for the liguistics.
There were times you shared, your sorrows and pains, your struggles and your weaknesses, but what did it amount to?
With silence you killed me and this relationship, pretending I'm a stranger.
Silence is lethal, it means nothing, yet says so much.
It causes the mind to go crazy, to speculate, and obliterate.
It says, "leave me alone!" Yet causes the heart to grow ever fonder.
Silence is a knife, cutting without a sound, splitting without much fuss.
It is potent, effective, yet empty at the same time.
It whispers "go no farther" to a car speeding at a hundred miles an hour.
Perhaps it's not me, but yourself, or the institution, that's causing you to feel this way.
Maybe you feel guilty, embaressed, or non-chalant.
Maybe you feel angry, sad, and disappointed.
Maybe it's disillusionment, disgust, and utter shame.
A thousand maybes, all the fruit of your silence.
Why do this to me, and to many others?
What irony, in the age of social networking, that you are silent yet loud at the same time.
Your Facebook profile screams at me, inviting me to peek into your life.
From personal to impersonal, your smile fades, your joy reeks, it disgusts me.
What hides behind that smile? Is it unbridled joy, endless sorrow, or something in between?
Your presence is an insult, a constant shadow, chasing me into my dreams.
It's time to let you go, yet it's so hard.
Maybe we will meet someday again, and I wish you success.
May you find happiness in your pursuits, and will you please reach your dreams for me?
Should you leave these shores, may you not forget yourself.
Someday, maybe, we will meet.
May God be with you.
Courtesy of Senhor Terence Lee, an ex-classmate with flair for the liguistics.
Tuesday, December 09, 2008
I need a target
Oh well, things are pretty peachy for now. Just got my license, and been driving around like a crazy person for the past few days(crazy as in crazy BUT safe). Took leave for today so i cud relax abit and use up some of that un-used leave thats been accumulating.
Also, on another front, just did Judgement day and i just wanted to say how boring it was.. haha.. it was pretty straight forward lah, and i need a story with more twist than that.. It was too errmm.. serious for me.. but the cast and audience were really cool, so im good.
I want to welcome Shahdon back. Missed his orc laughter but now he's back, its just non-stop laughs. Im beginning to miss hanging with Yazid too, tho if things go as i see it, i could potentially see him everyday in camp(which is too lame for my taste :) )
Nearly got the car towed away on sunday, cos i totally forgot about the Standard Chart marathon. They had already set up, the tow truck was poised behind my car, and the cisco guys were already gesturing to each other about how to go about towing the car away. Luckily i got there in time after running my own marathon with zallie and hamad.. haha.. That was lucky!
I really need a target. or at least something to look forward too. Suddenly, everything feels so out of focus, theres no more joy in anything. I feel like a zombie sometimes. Going thru the motions. There doesnt seem to be anything that can cheer me up from this funk, and the more I try, the less i want to continue trying.
Maybe ill go get myself my own car. then i wont mope around quite so much. haha.
:)
OH and YAH! Do visit our new webby!
http://iwantayellowchair.com/
to get updates of our productions, past, future and present..
Also, on another front, just did Judgement day and i just wanted to say how boring it was.. haha.. it was pretty straight forward lah, and i need a story with more twist than that.. It was too errmm.. serious for me.. but the cast and audience were really cool, so im good.
I want to welcome Shahdon back. Missed his orc laughter but now he's back, its just non-stop laughs. Im beginning to miss hanging with Yazid too, tho if things go as i see it, i could potentially see him everyday in camp(which is too lame for my taste :) )
Nearly got the car towed away on sunday, cos i totally forgot about the Standard Chart marathon. They had already set up, the tow truck was poised behind my car, and the cisco guys were already gesturing to each other about how to go about towing the car away. Luckily i got there in time after running my own marathon with zallie and hamad.. haha.. That was lucky!
I really need a target. or at least something to look forward too. Suddenly, everything feels so out of focus, theres no more joy in anything. I feel like a zombie sometimes. Going thru the motions. There doesnt seem to be anything that can cheer me up from this funk, and the more I try, the less i want to continue trying.
Maybe ill go get myself my own car. then i wont mope around quite so much. haha.
:)
OH and YAH! Do visit our new webby!
http://iwantayellowchair.com/
to get updates of our productions, past, future and present..
Friday, December 05, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Eddie Izzard on Star wars Cantina
hahahah... This is a made up scene with lego characters based on Eddie Izzards Stand up. It cracked me up just watching it. For those people prefering to see the original, its the second Video. Enjoy! :)
ORIGINAL!
ORIGINAL!
Friday, November 21, 2008
The Singaporean Dream
I had a conversation with Khamal a while back, and at that moment, it didnt strike a chord with me at all. I didnt agree when he said that being stuck in Singapore was the worst thing to happen to anyone. Getting a stable job, getting married, having a car and a condo, all this served only to root a person down, to prevent him from seeing the world.
I told him he was mad, that there was no better place to live in than Singapore. I told him how much i love my country, love my job, love my home.
Suddenly, things arent so clear. I saw a pic of a friend of mine, who is currently overseas, and i envy him. The total freedom of living in another place where things are different, and being given a chance to re-create oneself totally. New histories, new friends and a new life.
A second chance at everything.
Am I really ready to commit to anything now in my life? Am i willing to work in the same organisation for the rest of my days knowing that there's only one life to live? Am i super satisfied with what i have even though I wont be able to sate this recurrent feeling of wanderlust?
Doesnt matter. Someone once said that the best dreams are those that are unattainable.
I told him he was mad, that there was no better place to live in than Singapore. I told him how much i love my country, love my job, love my home.
Suddenly, things arent so clear. I saw a pic of a friend of mine, who is currently overseas, and i envy him. The total freedom of living in another place where things are different, and being given a chance to re-create oneself totally. New histories, new friends and a new life.
A second chance at everything.
Am I really ready to commit to anything now in my life? Am i willing to work in the same organisation for the rest of my days knowing that there's only one life to live? Am i super satisfied with what i have even though I wont be able to sate this recurrent feeling of wanderlust?
Doesnt matter. Someone once said that the best dreams are those that are unattainable.
Monday, November 17, 2008
HAHA! THIS IS COOL SHIT!
Watch the first video, then watch the second!
I swear, if Shai was to write Shows like this for a living, he would do the same damn thing..
:)
I swear, if Shai was to write Shows like this for a living, he would do the same damn thing..
:)
Sunday, November 16, 2008
Sailed away
Ive been watching CHUCK again!
Found this as i was perusing(yes, big word!) you tube on the series..
SAILED AWAY
Does it hurt to hear me say
That I never really meant to stay
I left you right where I want you
Now there's nothin' left
And not a reason
There's nothin' left to believe in
When just one remains
I've sailed away
Such a foolish game
That we have been playin'
Now you got me right where you want me
I left you in the right
But you wouldn't let me take the fall
Now you've got me right where you want me
CHORUS
Now there's nothin' left
And that's the reason
There's not much left to believe in
If it's all just the same
I'll sail away
You pushed so hard
You have to know that
You might just get what you wanted
And when just one remains
I've sailed away
I found out on my own
Everything that I've been missin'
Now I've got you right where I want you
Now that we're apart
I see just who you are
You're always gonna be
The one to keep hatin'
Now I've got you right where I want you
chorus
I'm not one to hide my face behind the pain
It's not like me to beg you to stay
I'll just sail away
chorus
And when just one remains
You know I've sailed away
Does it hurt to hear me say
That I never really meant to stay
Found this as i was perusing(yes, big word!) you tube on the series..
SAILED AWAY
Does it hurt to hear me say
That I never really meant to stay
I left you right where I want you
Now there's nothin' left
And not a reason
There's nothin' left to believe in
When just one remains
I've sailed away
Such a foolish game
That we have been playin'
Now you got me right where you want me
I left you in the right
But you wouldn't let me take the fall
Now you've got me right where you want me
CHORUS
Now there's nothin' left
And that's the reason
There's not much left to believe in
If it's all just the same
I'll sail away
You pushed so hard
You have to know that
You might just get what you wanted
And when just one remains
I've sailed away
I found out on my own
Everything that I've been missin'
Now I've got you right where I want you
Now that we're apart
I see just who you are
You're always gonna be
The one to keep hatin'
Now I've got you right where I want you
chorus
I'm not one to hide my face behind the pain
It's not like me to beg you to stay
I'll just sail away
chorus
And when just one remains
You know I've sailed away
Does it hurt to hear me say
That I never really meant to stay
Monday, November 10, 2008
Judgement day
Fans of Yellow Chair!
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Come and see our next prodcution!!!
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Come and see our next prodcution!!!
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Tekong
I just came back(read: 2 days ago) from Tekong, and i realise something.. Army is getting so comfortable now! Theres a shelter, fans, lights, a parade square.. its a wonder that hey call it outfield anymore..
Things at work have been almost smooth cruising. My colleagues are pretty cool, at least the new leftenants while the older birds are quite cool about things.
Its not the same though. Ever since Taiwan ive been looking forward to coming home, but nowadays, i just wanna stay whereever it is I am cos its so much easier. Seriously. haha
As things go, theres a play entitled "Judgement Day" coming out on the 6th of December so if ya'll free, come on down to the Room upstairs. when i get the full in fo, itll be up. yeah? :) im acting in it!!
and i came out in 2x5 dol! woohoo!! my first few seconds of fame!
And Tak dong cheng, starring our very own Yazid Jalil was a blast! really! its so cool lah, seeing him on the big screen. What i wouldnt give to have acted with him
Sorry zid for not meeting up for movies. im pretty shagged out and the whole family is searching for the rat(s) thats been swarming around the house. Its not a stupid excuse. When u have to wade through rat poo you would noe. haha
Thats all. Very random, but all true.
Your on my mind.
Things at work have been almost smooth cruising. My colleagues are pretty cool, at least the new leftenants while the older birds are quite cool about things.
Its not the same though. Ever since Taiwan ive been looking forward to coming home, but nowadays, i just wanna stay whereever it is I am cos its so much easier. Seriously. haha
As things go, theres a play entitled "Judgement Day" coming out on the 6th of December so if ya'll free, come on down to the Room upstairs. when i get the full in fo, itll be up. yeah? :) im acting in it!!
and i came out in 2x5 dol! woohoo!! my first few seconds of fame!
And Tak dong cheng, starring our very own Yazid Jalil was a blast! really! its so cool lah, seeing him on the big screen. What i wouldnt give to have acted with him
Sorry zid for not meeting up for movies. im pretty shagged out and the whole family is searching for the rat(s) thats been swarming around the house. Its not a stupid excuse. When u have to wade through rat poo you would noe. haha
Thats all. Very random, but all true.
Your on my mind.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Violent Stabbings In Woodlands!
I found out a very shocking news the other day.. About a violent stabbing that happened in Woodlands. Its very sad to see how much the victim suffered before he died, there was blood, sweat and tears all over the place.
It was weird though. It seemed to have been a surgical strike to the heart , but the victim must have suffered quite alot due to the evidence shown. Clenched teeth. Dried tears on his eyebags. Body curled up in a foetal position. He was prety strong though, or else he had the endurance of an elephant on creatine, because he had crawled quite a distance away from the scene. You can see the blood smear stretching all the way to his house from the front gate.
I wonder if he will be mourned. Seems to be a pretty good looking bloke. Lived in a condo with his parents, sister and two brothers. Pity he had to go like that.
I saw the article where he had written a few words before he was stabbed. Seems like he was sorry about something he had done to his gf. There were a few dramatic lines involving waiting and hoping, or some such nonsense, but he did seem quite adamant that what he said be taken at face value. And oh, he mentioned he would love her forever.
Well, whatever he promised, he took it to his grave. Let us all take a few moments to remember the lost.
Because one of these days, we might find ourselves in a similar situation.
It was weird though. It seemed to have been a surgical strike to the heart , but the victim must have suffered quite alot due to the evidence shown. Clenched teeth. Dried tears on his eyebags. Body curled up in a foetal position. He was prety strong though, or else he had the endurance of an elephant on creatine, because he had crawled quite a distance away from the scene. You can see the blood smear stretching all the way to his house from the front gate.
I wonder if he will be mourned. Seems to be a pretty good looking bloke. Lived in a condo with his parents, sister and two brothers. Pity he had to go like that.
I saw the article where he had written a few words before he was stabbed. Seems like he was sorry about something he had done to his gf. There were a few dramatic lines involving waiting and hoping, or some such nonsense, but he did seem quite adamant that what he said be taken at face value. And oh, he mentioned he would love her forever.
Well, whatever he promised, he took it to his grave. Let us all take a few moments to remember the lost.
Because one of these days, we might find ourselves in a similar situation.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Shagged out? Totally
Its been awhile since i chilled with pals and gals till the early hours. It was tiring and so absolutely fabulous in its way, but I cant shake off that feeling no matter how hard I try. Its a vicious cycle, the constant need to find something to do that busy's my mind so i wont come back to the same thoughts.
Sometimes its a blessing to be crap at multi-tasking.
I watched Nights in Rodanthe, Tropic thunder(again) and REC. It was a nice mix of romance,comedy and horror, combining to achieve the desired effect. Going out with Shai, Yaz and Sam never seemed so fun!
It was great seeing her again. Been awhile since we talked beb, but im glad i have friends like you! I used to be so full up on girlfriends that i really miss those days when i could have a female view on things without having to resort to asking my mum(which is not a good idea, actually). Ill upload ur photo soon, so you can stop griping me to send it to you, yeah?
Im tired. But content. Thanks for the night guys..
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Reboot
Who pressed the hidden bell,
that stopped all beauteous things?
The tinkling softness that breaks upon,
the brow of beggars and Kings.
Where is the shining sun,
that warms the timid grass?
The soaring clouds above the sea,
all gone to shadows and dust.
Why does the wind blow cold?
Across the scorched and charred ground.
The fading ring of that hidden bell,
how can my heart be found?
Anon.
Poets sum things up so damn well..
that stopped all beauteous things?
The tinkling softness that breaks upon,
the brow of beggars and Kings.
Where is the shining sun,
that warms the timid grass?
The soaring clouds above the sea,
all gone to shadows and dust.
Why does the wind blow cold?
Across the scorched and charred ground.
The fading ring of that hidden bell,
how can my heart be found?
Anon.
Poets sum things up so damn well..
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
I was sitting in the lecture(sports science i think) and i realise i was suddenly so PREGNANT with creative ideas. I wanted to pen down some Ilyas right away. But the problem was, where to start?
I could write about his death? Nah too passe.
I could write about his beginning? Batman Begins anyone?
I could write some non-stop action involving his super fast reflexes and an impervious green jacket? Smallville all over again.
I could write about his life in school? Back to hogwarts people!
AH! i Could write about his relationships with Lois and the red haired girl! erm.. no.. i dont think so.. sounds alot like my secondary school journal I unearthed the other day.. super kental!
So i sat there, all pregnant, not knowing where to give birth to my brilliant yet misunderstood ideas.. when i thought about something. Ever since i joined the army and set foot into OCS, Ive always wanted to make a movie, or a series, about a cadet in the army. It wouldnt just be my experience, but the total experience of a bunch of us narrating the times we were in green and had white bars on our shoulders. It would be so cool. How tough it is, the expectations,the friction between cadets, the love stories, the physical training, the mindless tekan, the Missions, the drama! all captured on film or in words.
But i dont think it would be allowed. It would definitely be rated and knowing our guys up there, itll be cut to nothing before it even hits the big screens.
It would be great though. It would be great to just document what ive done, How ive done, why i did it. To show how incredibly proud i am to be serving my nation in this capacity.
So i wrote a few scenes briefly(like really briefly. try one sentence each) and i found i was looking at a cool idea in the vein of Jarhead and/or Band of brothers(without the war).
Maybe ill continue to write later. Maybe not. See how lah.
:)
The other day i was looking at this box where i keep all my keepsakes of my past, and i found myself being drawn to the picture of me and Bella. There were two, one in the open, another squirraled away in a book. I had totally forgotten about her after the great bust up a couple of years ago(entirely my fault) and it was a quick punch to my brain to see us smiling so happily from the pictures that were taken 6 years ago. It was as if we didnt know that we were heading to a really messy separation.
But what to do.
Ive always known me and him were in this whole roman-carthaginian thing where neither could live while the other survives(or harry and volde come to think of it). Looks like i went the hannibal way( though ive always loved them better. Elephants in the alps and all that) but in retrospect, i think im okay with that. Im just sad that we cant be friends still. In previous entries i did say so, but i just want to clarify, to myself most of all (since this is my blog) that i dont harbour no feelings for dear old bella anymore. It was a sad teenage child who fell for her awkward beauty years ago, and obsessed over her everyday, practicing the words to say if the hoped for moment ever came. It did arrive, actually. :) and like all things,there's always room for mr cockup.
I miss the times we spent together. Looking back, i can laugh at how silly i was, a lost teenager with grandiose ideas of love. But that boy is gone now. He grew up, learnt from his mistakes, and dearly wished he could have his friend back, at least to talk to about shit thats going down.
But the man wishes in vain. The awkward girl? she's gone too.
sadly.
(wow.. so emo seh! stop it siak..)
how about a joke? anyone heard about the bakaweh joke?
I could write about his death? Nah too passe.
I could write about his beginning? Batman Begins anyone?
I could write some non-stop action involving his super fast reflexes and an impervious green jacket? Smallville all over again.
I could write about his life in school? Back to hogwarts people!
AH! i Could write about his relationships with Lois and the red haired girl! erm.. no.. i dont think so.. sounds alot like my secondary school journal I unearthed the other day.. super kental!
So i sat there, all pregnant, not knowing where to give birth to my brilliant yet misunderstood ideas.. when i thought about something. Ever since i joined the army and set foot into OCS, Ive always wanted to make a movie, or a series, about a cadet in the army. It wouldnt just be my experience, but the total experience of a bunch of us narrating the times we were in green and had white bars on our shoulders. It would be so cool. How tough it is, the expectations,the friction between cadets, the love stories, the physical training, the mindless tekan, the Missions, the drama! all captured on film or in words.
But i dont think it would be allowed. It would definitely be rated and knowing our guys up there, itll be cut to nothing before it even hits the big screens.
It would be great though. It would be great to just document what ive done, How ive done, why i did it. To show how incredibly proud i am to be serving my nation in this capacity.
So i wrote a few scenes briefly(like really briefly. try one sentence each) and i found i was looking at a cool idea in the vein of Jarhead and/or Band of brothers(without the war).
Maybe ill continue to write later. Maybe not. See how lah.
:)
The other day i was looking at this box where i keep all my keepsakes of my past, and i found myself being drawn to the picture of me and Bella. There were two, one in the open, another squirraled away in a book. I had totally forgotten about her after the great bust up a couple of years ago(entirely my fault) and it was a quick punch to my brain to see us smiling so happily from the pictures that were taken 6 years ago. It was as if we didnt know that we were heading to a really messy separation.
But what to do.
Ive always known me and him were in this whole roman-carthaginian thing where neither could live while the other survives(or harry and volde come to think of it). Looks like i went the hannibal way( though ive always loved them better. Elephants in the alps and all that) but in retrospect, i think im okay with that. Im just sad that we cant be friends still. In previous entries i did say so, but i just want to clarify, to myself most of all (since this is my blog) that i dont harbour no feelings for dear old bella anymore. It was a sad teenage child who fell for her awkward beauty years ago, and obsessed over her everyday, practicing the words to say if the hoped for moment ever came. It did arrive, actually. :) and like all things,there's always room for mr cockup.
I miss the times we spent together. Looking back, i can laugh at how silly i was, a lost teenager with grandiose ideas of love. But that boy is gone now. He grew up, learnt from his mistakes, and dearly wished he could have his friend back, at least to talk to about shit thats going down.
But the man wishes in vain. The awkward girl? she's gone too.
sadly.
(wow.. so emo seh! stop it siak..)
how about a joke? anyone heard about the bakaweh joke?
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